You should hire me to do your ads.

21 December, 2007 at 2:09 pm (Funny pics) (, , , , , , )

We’ve all had our experiences when it comes to ads that are ineffective in conveying their message, to those that are stupid and downright insulting to our intelligence. The reason why some ads sucked were because the product itself is shitty so no amount of ads can save its ass, others because the product itself was badly named hence conjuring all sorts of nasty imaginations in the consumer’s perverted minds, as featured here before.

Most of the time, ads are ineffective because the ad companies simply fail to grasp the concept of effective marketing. Sure they might have fancy-schmancy 3D pictures with all sorts of funky design, yet they can’t seem to deliver the message properly.

Now this is where I came in. Armed with (limited) knowledge in advertisement acquired during 2nd year studies in complementary courses – marketing and basic business, I, the engineer wannabe will demonstrate to you why you should hire me to do your ads.

Let’s take this ad for illustration purposes (taken from the health mag with the uber-lame name – HealthToday) :

Just a kid pretending to look bored while simultaneously attempting to pass motion. And there’s the pic of a couple of bottles of dope supplements called Citrex at the bottom. On first inspection, nothing seems to be wrong with this ad except for one minor detail: TOO WORDY.

Any self-respecting consumer wouldn’t give two hoots to all the texts because there’s just too many of them. So herein lies the problem; people get distracted by the pic and can’t be bothered with what’s written. In fact a mere glance of this ad would leave most people scratching their nuts wondering hmmm, does this Citrex thing works to aid crap dumping or merely an antidepressant to eliminate depression and boredom resulting from sitting on a plastic shitbowl? My bet is with the second suggestion. Hence the ad has FAILED to deliver its true essence.

We live in a fast-paced world therefore information must be conveyed in an immediate manner with the least distraction as possible. It should be simple, succint, straight to the point like how a one night stand should be – wham, bam, thank you mam! Following that concept, I’ve come up with suitable texts to go along with the picture in the ad. You know, the kind of text that would return the balance to a disrupted equilibrium caused by the high-impact picture:

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See how I managed to deliver the message effectively with such few words? In fact, I only used a grand total of SIX alphabets to not only tell consumers that Citrex is a kind of kids-friendly laxative, but also informed them that the supplement is to be taken orally. Not injected nor shoved up the ass. Killed 2 birds with one stone. Genius!

Damn I’m good. And I’m not even expensive.

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2 Comments

  1. Suffian Rahman said,

    Dude that’s hilarious. Seriously, don’t knock off a career in advertising.

  2. misstrouble said,

    How could you say 4 sentences is too “wordy?” I think the real problem is that people don’t bother to read those 4 sentences, major details that is probably harmful to overpass. People may get distracted by the picture, yes, but if the picture wasn’t there, you wouldn’t even have glanced over those 4 sentences.

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